life doesn't always go according to plan.
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Life Doesn’t Always Go According To Plan…

Today I’m taking you on a little time travel. Grab a cuppa something, cause this one’s a bit long…

June 2017

My son graduates high school and the time has come for me to move on to the next adventure and phase of life…head South to the Sunshine state.

You see, I had been talking about moving to Florida for several years. Everyone knew this was my dream because I had been talking about it for so damn long….four years at this point. People were getting tired of all the talk and no action I think πŸ˜‰

But something always held me back. But low and behold, my darling 18 year old son said it best and called me out on my BS when he said:

Stop making excuses mom! I graduated, am an adult now and will be living my life, now you really don’t have any excuses for not going!

The last of my excuses had been ‘I can’t do anything until my kiddo graduates.’Β  Who knew that time would come so quick???

I started researching areas I would be interested in living, places to rent, etc. … because you know, this time I was going to do it, just get up and go!

But I found myself holding back yet again. I was feeling confused about whether that’s really what I wanted and how I would handle living there part time and escape the summer heat to live in Michigan…in the summer heat here πŸ˜‰

Fast forward to October 2017

My sister takes a job as a traveling nurse with her first three month contract in Portland Oregon and asks if I would like to do a cross country road trip with her. I was a little wishy/washy about going, but then while talking to one of my closest friends (and smart coach!) I realized I was a HELL YES to taking this road trip.Β It was a chilly Northern Michigan Fall Day when we finished packing her car and headed out for the three day cross country road trip …

Day one was long, with not all that exciting views, landing us in Minneapolis, Minnesota for the night.

Day two was getting more exciting as the views changed and we started seeing things I don’t know how to describe. I don’t remember where we ended day two (Montana I want to say), I just remember we were both exhausted and excited that day three would be a bit longer but put us at our final destination – my sister’s apartment in Portland, Oregon!

Day three is something I will never be able to put into words or explain how amazing, magnificent, majestic (I think you catch my drift lol), and breath taking the views were. We both uttered “holy shit, wow, did you see that?, oh my lord it’s beautiful” more times than I could count!

Because I had loved Florida so much I never knew I could fall in love with mountains, greenery, ranch land, and hills…but I did. As we were coming into Oregon and the Columbia River…man, it gives me chills just remembering those views! It truly was breathtaking and nothing like I had ever seen before. And the Fall colors – oh good lord, Michigan has nothing on the Fall colors out west!

These are just a handful of the many pics I took (and trust me, pictures do NOT do any of it justice!). And the picture at the top, with the title on it, is picture of just one of the gorgeous views in Oregon that I fell in love with!:

(Note: if you click on the images, they will open up in a new window full size)

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A Huge Mental / Heart Shift Happened

But something happened on that last day of our drive…my heart shifted and changed. I came to a huge realization, and one that wasn’t easy to admit!

I realized the only reason I wanted to live in Florida was because that was all I had known.

That’s the only place I had traveled (other than visiting Arizona in the 6th grade, Tennessee in 9th grade & Hawaii in 10th grade) and it felt comfortable and ‘safe’.

I found myself muttering out loud:

I could live here easier than I could live in Florida.

Whoa…wait a minute. What did I just say? Did that really come out of my mouth? Yep, it sure did and it felt peaceful, like suddenly I was ok with where I could eventually find myself living. It didn’t feel forced or hard, it just felt good. And the below image fits so perfectly with what I was feeling that day…

Photo credit: Positive Outlooks on Facebook

Little did I know God had a reason (as if I should ever doubt his plan/purpose for the way things go!) for no to Florida, and yes to the road trip with my sister!

Right before I was to head back to Michigan, my dating app dinged notifying me I had a new message. I forgot it was location based and if your location was turned on on your phone, you popped up in searches for locals. Anyway, I had a new message from a gentleman in the area. I wasn’t interested in a long-distance relationship and let him know I was from Michigan. Curiosity got the best of me and I started looking through some of the men’s profiles…knowing I wouldn’t contact any of them or that nothing would come of it because, well the distance thing.

Hmmm…little did I know πŸ˜‰

A gentleman messaged me, I read what he wrote (he actually wrote in full sentences, didn’t send a d*ck pick – more on that here – and I liked his profile, aside from a few silly things I said no to (bald head, short, and Mexican – no I’m not being racist, that decision was based on the way an ex who was Mexican treated me). Those were “no’s” in my book because I had an ideal of what my man would look like and be like. But I decided to respond to him because I was intrigued and because a friend had asked me if I would simply be willing to be open to new experiences and possibilities!

Responding to that one message, when I would have normally said no and ignored him because he didn’t “fit” my ideal was the best decision ever. I was open to giving him a chance, just getting to know him on a friend level..but that quickly changed the more we got to know one another.

Jaime and I have been doing the long-distance thing for 9 months now.Β  I’ve been blessed to travel out there frequently – it’s hard for him to get the time off work & I have the freedom/flexibility to travel. Long-distance is hard, but so worth it.

But now, the time has come where the long distance thing is about to change…

August 2018

The time has come to close this chapter of my life and small town Northern Michigan living where all I’ve ever known is – family, friends, my son, my AA recovery community. It’s been my safety net, my security blanket. But it’s also been the one place that seems to hold me back too (but that’s a different story).

I turned the keys to my apartment a week before the end of August, spent a few nights at my mom’s, then headed to my best friend’s for a night of ‘family’ (my second family – her family) camping fun, a day of rest and then we headed out to embark on a cross country trip. Her first, my second… only this time the final destination is a little different, Washington state and I’m staying put πŸ™‚

I love him.Β I love us.

And I love where our adventures and the next phase of life are going to take us! This is one time I can say I am so thankful that life doesn’t always go according to plan… err, at least according to my plans πŸ˜‰

6 Comments

  • Kristin Lohmeyer

    This honestly brought tears to my eyes Tishia! Girl, you are glowing! I am SO flipping happy for you guys!

    For someone like me, who’s a big scaredy cat, this post hit the nail on the head. Sometimes we need to let go of whatever security blanket we’ve been hanging onto, take the leap and enjoy where the journey takes us πŸ™‚ Thanks so much for posting.

    Love you bunches and can’t wait to see and hear all about your new adventures!

    • Tishia

      Thanks for your comment Kristin. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t scared…I’m scared sh*tless too πŸ˜‰ Everything I have ever known is here. My family and friends won’t be close enough I can just hop in the car and see them in a few minutes. My recovery group and safety net of sober sisters is here. My son is here. Blah blah blah… but I know it will be worth it to start my life with Jaime and have new adventures. Plus with having my own business I can still travel here to visit a couple times a year too πŸ™‚

  • Avery

    Oh, how exciting for you, Tish! I think it’s amazing that you were in the right place at the right time and in the right frame of mind to say, “YES!” So, so happy for you! πŸ™‚

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