Over the years of learning to love myself there was a lot of inner work that had to be done & still has to be done. This is an ongoing journey, not a destination, after all 😉 Getting to the place I am today, loving my body & self just as I am, was and is a journey about so much more than loving my physical body which is still hard as hell some days!
This journey has been about peeling back layer after layer (onion peeling as we commonly referred to it in AA) and learning more and more about myself. Learning to reframe negative self-talk. Learning to let go of the victim mentality I lived so much of my life in. Learning to trust myself.
On and on the list goes.
But there's one thing I found doing the inner work – 4 lies I was telling myself over and over that were keeping me stuck. And over the years, through many conversations with other women, these are 4 common lies that many women tell themselves:
1. I am untrustworthy
You tell yourself you can’t trust yourself, your decisions or opinions. Even though you come with an inner compass, a guidance system, and pretty accurate intuition. Trust yourself, your heart knows the way!
2. I will never be happy until I have (insert want here)
You already have everything you need to be happy, you just need to reach inside and grab it. When you fall into the trap of believing that attaining things brings you happiness, you are stuck in a vicious cycle – get out quick!
3. All my mistakes are such a waste of my time
Your mistakes aren’t holding you back unless you let them. Start re-framing failure. When you make a mistake, look for the lesson and move on. Don’t feed quarters to the ass-kicking machine!
4. Life keeps dealing me a bad hand
You have a lot more control than you think. If you are stuck, take responsibility and get yourself out and make better choices. Stop being a victim, own your power & take your life/power back!
These lies hurt. In my case, each one of these 4 lies held me back in so many different ways. Once I stopped believing them and started changing my thoughts, my actions started to change, and soon I was living a different life – a life full of fun, adventure, love, and so much more.
Look at each of these 4 lies. Do you see yourself believing one (or all) of them? If so, I challenge you to start questioning it, dig a little deeper and get to the root cause of why you're believing the lie. And then find a way to reframe the lie to a truth. For example, you could create an affirmation reframing the I am untrustworthy lie. Instead, say I am trustworthy. My heart knows best. I can trust myself to make the best decisions for me.