Telling Stories of Hope, Love and Transformation.
When a hurting woman catches a glimpse of her true Shining Self, she won’t be satisfied with less again.
About Shining Self
My blog is a lifestyle blog so you will find a mixture of topics:
- Body Positivity
- Dealing with Negative Thoughts
- Plus Size Life
- Sober Living
- Self-limiting beliefs
- … and more!
About The Your Shining Self Podcast
My podcast, Your Shining Self, features stories of amazing women who have overcome some sort of obstacle big or small (healing after abortion, getting sober, loss of a loved one, family member addict… and so much more) and have stepped into owning their amazing and living their best lives, not looking at their past in shame but instead of finding it part of their journey, who they are and using it as a message.
What I Want You To Know About Me (Tishia a.k.a. The Body Positive Fairy Godmother Tish)
I like pink.
I love shiny, blingy, glittery things.
But the most important thing? I like me. Scratch that, I LOVE me.
@shiningselftlThis is me. I’m fat & beautiful! ##thisisme ##shiningself ##biggirlhype ##fatisbeautifultoo ##effyourbodystandards ##plussizequeen ##plussizemodel♬ original sound – Taryn
Yes, I’m fat and LOVE me!
My chubby cheeks & double chin.
My arms that flap like bat wings.
My big, soft, stretchmarks galore, belly
My jiggly thighs.
My saggy boobs.
You name it, I love it!
Kidding aside… it’s taken a lot of work to get to this place. I used to be a hot mess and then some! Ask anyone that knows me and they may be a little too willing to attest to that 😉
Most of my life I lived behind a mask, pretending to be someone I wasn’t. I felt like a chameleon, always changing my ‘color’ (personality/how I acted) based on the people I was around…family included.
Because I was hurting on the inside, didn’t know who I was, what my self-worth was, had low self-esteem (the list goes on and on) I started making harmful choices:
- Sexual promiscuity (any attention from a man was better than none)
- Binge drinking eventually turning into every day drinking
- Binge eating & binging and purging (as well as other disordered eating)
- Shopping sprees (harmful in a financial sense)
- Self-harm (cutting)
Admitting I Had A Problem & Needed Help Was The First Step
The morning after my 35th birthday, waking up to another massive hangover from a night of binge drinking turned blackout, I lay in bed crying uncontrollably as another dude laid passed out snoring in my bed. And not that it makes it any better, but for once this wasn’t some random man, it was actually someone I knew… and dated his brother several years before (yeah, talk about keepin ‘er classy, right?! Oh the joys of small town Northern Michigan living).
For whatever reason, that morning was my rock bottom. It was in that moment I knew I couldn’t keep going like I was. My life was unmanageable and falling apart at the seams. There were two options I saw at that time – killing myself or picking up the phone and admitting I needed help. Because I’m here writing this, you can probably guess I chose the latter of the two options (thank you Jesus!).
That one phone call was the beginning of my metamorphosis – the beginning to my transformation! It was a long process (and still is!) but one I’m so thankful I started and continue working on….every. single. day! As I began the outpatient alcohol addiction treatment, counseling, AA meetings, and more I started to learn more about me and who I was as a person – the REAL me.
And that meant, I didn’t want to act. I didn’t want to pretend anymore.
I’m a real person. I’m rough around the edges, still struggle some days with self-confidence, self-worth, feeling valuable, etc. but that’s OK! It’s just part of the process.
There’s no more mask – I want YOU and everyone else to see the true me…faults and all! Some things you may agree with and others you may not…that’s okay! We can agree to disagree right now and all be REAL together.
Conquering The World As The Real Authentic Badass, Empowered, Woman I am Today
- Sexual abuse survivor
- Recovering alcoholic (7 years sober as of March 3, 2021)
- Built credit up enough to finally be approved for a car loan in Jan 2016 and am for the first time ever the proud owner of a “new” car (2013 VW Beetle)…it makes me grin and feel all giddy just typing that!
Eating healthy & down 54 lbs so far!NO MORE DIETS! NO MORE WEIGHT LOSS FOCUSED ACTIONS (aka restricting food, fad diets, etc.). Instead, I learned to accept and love myself as a fat woman and that my body was fine the way it is and I didn’t have to lose weight to accept myself or fit in because society and others around me say my body is wrong).
- Exercising regularly because I enjoy moving my fat body in ways that feel good!
- Great relationships with friends and family
- Willingness to be vulnerable and authentic…even if someone doesn’t like it
- Facing issues instead of running from them
- Loving myself faults and all!
Want to know more about me? Take a look at this Fun & Quirky Things About Me post. That’s me in a nutshell!
Remember, never let anyone dull your sparkle gorgeous! Keep on shining.